Let’s be real for a second. I’m a hot mess of a Mom & Wife. This picture was the day my coffee was delivered and if you can’t tell, it was way overdue.
I fight for my life every single month.
That’s dramatic, but just listen…
I suffer from something called PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder).
The first 10-ish days of my month I’m a rockstar. Playing and laughing with the kids, getting chores and errands done, feeling like a functional human being. I’m happy, I’m alive.
The rest of the month is like I’m drowning and can’t catch my breath.
Rage, suicidal thoughts, separating myself from my life, wishing away all of the good things, giving up on everything, extreme anxiety and depression.
Then just like THAT, the storm passes and the sun shines again.
Repeat, EVERY SINGLE month.
I’ve quit drinking the coffee about 10x in the past few years. Trying a gazillion different other things–medication, diet changes, vitamins, drinks. I’ve tried it all.
I keep coming back to this miracle coffee. Why? Because when I’m in my good days I don’t feel I need anything to be happy, then the bad days come and I’d give just about anything for a smidge of happiness.
Let’s talk about today…
As I enter the WORST point in my cycle, I actually feel okay.
I played with my toddler this morning.
I organized my bathroom drawers.
I feel motivated to continue to work towards my goals.
I’m not trying to pick unnecessary fights with my husband.
I feel calm, and not like a volcano seconds away from eruption with one little push.
This speaks volumes.
